Posted by: txaggiechick | August 6, 2007

Curse of the optomist

This weekend wasn’t the best. I wasn’t able to achieve the things that I wanted to get done. I ended up upsetting some people that I really care about and all of the time I feel like I’m walking on eggshells. There is a curse that I was born with. I’m the fixer. I’m the one that people all go to to help them fix things. I’m level headed and optimistic. I do my best to help people feel better about themselves. Sometimes, it would just be easy to embrace the inner demons. It would be so much easier to yell and scream at my stupid car. It would be so much easier to blame the tow truck man for making me wait for 4 and  a half hours in podunkville for a tow. It’s so tempting to just let go and throw a temper tantrum about the things that aren’t going my way. But yet this weekend I found the strength to attempt to make the most out of a difficult week and situation. I went and ate some of the best bbq in texas. I bought a few books, a new decoration for my apartment, and some presents for my friends. It’s just sometimes a curse to always try to be soo good and to be optimist. Sometimes, it would be so nice just to let go and be irrational, passionate, obstinate, and behave badly. Maybe one day I’ll just let go.

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