Posted by: txaggiechick | May 18, 2008

Goldilocks and the 3 Bears

Yes. I know. I’m likening my life to a childhood story. Why not? This is my blog and I can behave like I’m 5 if I wanna. Besides, everything I ever really needed to know I learned in kindergarten anyway. So here I sit contemplating my housing choices. I’ve found too big. And the apartment is too small. Where is just right? Ideally just right is somewhere between 2700 square feet of home owning glory and a 20 minute commute to work without being out in suburbia (no offense to those suburbianites but not my forte). With hardwood floors, a small yard for a puppy, and under 200,000 dollars. Sounds ideal right? Easy to find? Hardly. But brick walls are there for a reason. They’re there to show us how much we want something. (Randy Paucsh)

I’m going to try them all out until i find just right. Hopefully that timeline is shortened by the ever looming termination of my current lease. What’s a girl to do? Torn between what I should do and what I wanna do, I’m comforted by the fact that I do not have to make the decision RIGHT now. Soon. yes. but not RIGHT now. And whatever decision I do make will not be wrong. My confidence in my personal decision making skills has been completely devastated like Katrina hitting New Orleans with my loss of certain toxic friendships (good riddance), my European Misadventure, and my mistakes in learning to prioritize my time over work (the stories of legend). So I’m slowly realizing that I don’t have to do everything right but I do need to make a decision. It’s going to be right for me. Not what I should do. not what people want me to do but what I need and want to do to put myself in a position to make me happy. Hate me if you want to. Love me if you can. I will find just right. Not too big, not too small but just right. It’s a wild ride. Stay tuned for more.

As an aside, to all you teachers out there. Guess what. You do make an impression on your students. Some of them even listen. A couple of weeks I flashed back to Mr. Boyles’s lecture on Revolutions when we were reading Les Miserables in sophomore English. I even recounted the story to some coworkers. This week it’s Mr. Shimek’s lectures about decisions. I’m haunted by the lesson I learned there where if you don’t make a decision… a decision will be made for you. So yes sir. I listened and I learned. And of course there’s always my mother and father. There are too many memories to count there so I’ll just end by saying.. Thanks!


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